Yes, even Hitler.

"There is that of God within every one." This is what I feel is the core of Quaker Faith. What I think informs all of our other testimonies and beliefs.

Since is spend so much time around people of faith who are not Friends. I frequently get asked what Quakers believe. 

A question that is unfortunately easier to answer in the negative with Hicksite Friends, with what we don't believe and do. There is a very good reason for this, and one that I hold as a positive. It is because we recognize that people's individual spiritual journey is just that, individual. Unlike other Denominations, we are not defined by whether or not we believe in the Trinity, the Divinity of Jesus, or what we consider sinful. We are more defined by our commitments to Integrity, Peace, Justice, Equality, and caring for the world.

Since I have been asked so many times "What do Quakers believe" my response has been refined to "There is so much variety between Quakers that isn't really an answerable question. However, I can tell you that our core belief is that there is that of God within every one." Weirdly enough, I've been asked more than once. "What, even Hitler?" I do have a ready answer to that. "Sometimes they make it really hard to see."

On the whole, everyone has trouble recognizing That of the Light in challenging people. We look at someone who we see as irredeemably evil... and our minds just won't let us see the better aspects of them. 

We also let this happen when we are dealing with people we just don't agree with. We decide that because we think they are wrong, there is nothing worthy about them, but that is a topic for another day.

Getting back to my original point. Yes Adolf Hitler had The Inner Light (another name for That of God). He chose to ignore his Light. The same can be said of many other people. Josef Stalin, Pol Pot, just about any American CEO or Hedge Fund manager, and one person whose name I'm sure will spring to everyone's mind by my not naming him.

While everyone does have a measure of the Light within them, listening to the Light and following it is a choice. We also have what I think of as The Inner Dark, what I have heard Evangelical's refer to as The Voice of Satan. In psychological terms it is the collection of biases, prejudices, hatreds, self centered beliefs, and personal aggrandizement that we all fall prey to. 

It would be so easy to give a long list of examples of people who followed the Light, and those who followed the Dark. Examples that would give the idea that it is an either or binary choice. Instead, I'm going to talk about a much more complicated figure.

In America Mahatma Gandhi is viewed as the ultimate Holy Man. A figure of inspiration when it comes to peace and nonviolence. Gandhi is an inspiration to many Generations of Friends (a specific positive example). I cannot speak to how he is viewed in India, but I am fairly certain that he is a national hero. 

So, imagine my surprise when I read about an effort inspired by the American movement to remove statues of controversial racist figures from public view. In Ghana, my Sister-in-Law's home country, the students were fighting to remove a statue of Mahatma Gandhi from their campus. 

Mahatma Gandhi was a lawyer originally, who worked in Africa... on the side of oppression. It would be fair to characterize  Gandhi's work in South Africa as about elevating Indians above the native African population. (For more on this subject I recommend this article Was Mahatma Gandhi a Racist) 

In Mahatma Gandhi I see a figure who both gave in to his Inner Dark, but then redeemed himself and followed the Inner Light.

While I am definitely no apologist for Adolf Hitler. I'm sure that there were many points in his life where Hitler could have chosen to follow his Inner Light... He never made that choice. Instead he followed his Inner Dark to the point where he is the example of The Ultimate Evil that everyone has in their hearts. Including mine.

In short, yes, even Hitler had That of God within him... Hitler chose not to listen.

She Keeps Searching.

Sally (Blond) and Dune (Tri-Color) on their final walk together.

Sniffing the ground frantically, Sally diligently searches for some trace of her Dune. Dune went on a walk with her in the morning. The Owners unclipped her from the split leash, and then took Dune back outside. The Owners took Dune for a ride, and when the Owners returned, Dune was not with them. Now, Sally knows Dune must have gone somewhere, and she can find him if she just follows his scent... Which is on the places he marked on the block.

This is what is most heartbreaking to me. How do you explain to a dog that her love is gone? How can you tell her that he is not coming home, and she can't find him by searching? 

One of our family dogs, Dune, suddenly developed a lump in his mouth a couple of weeks ago. We took him to vet, and he said that they would do surgery as soon as they got a new laser. Take out the lump and check to see if it was cancer. Well, in the time it took them to get the laser in, it got incredibly worse. Until finally, when we were scheduled to take him to get blood drawn for his surgery... We had to admit that the lump had taken over his mouth and we had to do the most difficult thing and take him to his final rest.

We took him to the ASPCA that he was adopted from nine years ago, paid the fees, and watched him happily walk out back with the worker. Completely unaware that this was his last day. I was supposed to be there for my younger sister, who owned Dune, and help her through this difficult task. However, I was so much worse than she was... And still am.

I know that what we did was necessary, but I miss Dune really badly right now. He was as much mine as my sister's. There is a reason they call dogs "man's best friend." While my dogs Happy and Sally (well I'm Sally's legal owner, but she's really my wife's now) are in good health... And I am grateful to still have them. There is a big Dune shaped hole in my life now.

I am a Quaker who believes in the Divine, and that there is something to come. I'm hoping that Dune has plenty of balls to chase, friends to play with, and comfy places to sleep.

The Crappy Fork

I was thinking about a story that illustrates one of the microcosms of a relationship.

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One day you meet a new woman and hit it off.

Eventually, you invite her over to dinner. Time to eat, and you grab a pair of forks from the drawer. 

Nothing wrong with either of them, you just happen to like one a lot more than the other. So, you give her the nice fork and make do with the crappy one.

Time passes, you spend more time together. Maybe you've moved in with one another, or gotten married. Your relationship is nothing but stronger.  You have plenty of forks, but for some reason those same two forks always pop up when you grab some for the two of you. Because, you still think the world of her, you still make an effort to give her the good fork. Keeping the crappy one for yourself.

This goes on for years, then one day she's in a bad mood. You bring her the good fork, and start using the crappy one. She snaps at you, "Why do you always get the good fork?"

It turns out that she really likes the other fork, and has been wanting it the whole time. Your good fork is her crappy fork, and vice versa...

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Now, the "Fork" can be anything in a relationship. A pillow, a book, a behavior, an action, a habit, or even a "move."

Somewhere that you think you are going out of your way to be awesome. However, because it has never been discussed. You are actually being self centered and projecting your own wants and needs onto someone else. This happens in just about every relationship, not just romantic ones. 

Honestly, I can't help but feel that all too often this happens to our relationship with the Divine. 

We worry about dressing nice for church. Praying exactly how we think God wants us to. Behaving exactly like everyone else in our congregation, and insisting that anyone new does the same. Adhering ever stronger to tradition or doctrine. Thinking that is what the Divine wants. In extreme cases this search for ever greater sanctity rises to the level of a mental illness called Scrupulosity (it's an offshoot of OCD).

In other words, giving God the "Fork" we think he wants.

It makes sense when you think about it. After all large fancy buildings, nice clothes, catchy music, tradition, and fancy equipment is what impresses us as humans. Surely the Divine must be impressed when we give all these things to them...

Like many Quakers, I think that the Divine craves something else. I personally feel the presence of the Light much more strongly when I am walking in a gorge, or reading a great book then when I am in church or meeting. (I respect that it is very often the opposite for others).

There have been times I wonder if God actually even wants worship, or if it embarrasses them... Or actively annoys the Divine.

There is only one thing that I am personally sure that the Divine wants. I'm only sure of it because there is That of God in Everyone. What the Divine definitely wants is for us to love and take care of each other. Yes, even _______ (fill in the blank with whoever you personally can't stand). Remember, there is That of God within them, even if we have trouble seeing it.

My Wife is My Partner.

Since my handwriting is somewhat messy. I will transcribe what it says above.

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Dear "Transformed Wife,"

"Oh Yummy!" When my wife says that as I hand her a plate of food I just cooked. It is the most amazing feeling I have ever experienced. The sheer happiness in her eyes. I love to cook. Why should I give that up?

I don't need anyone to take care of me. I am a smart, capable, and knowledgeable man. Not only can I cook, but I can clean, wash dishes, do laundry, and make minor household repairs. My wife does not need to mother me. I am fully capable on my own. No one expects me to do chores, except me.

I love my wife as my partner and equal. As Proverbs 31 suggests, I show appreciation for all of her works. I praise her for her work in the church, for her faith, and her boundless determination. She bolsters me through her strength, not by being my servant.

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I don't usually respond to things that I see online in my blog. Especially when others have written perfectly good rebuttals already. However, I do feel I have something to add to this conversation.

I recently became aware of Lori Alexander and her blog "The Transformed Wife." The above letter was my reaction to her regressive ideas. I will be completely honest here. I can't help but think to myself that she has no idea what Christian means. Also, I have scriptures about specks and logs running through my head when I read her "About Me" biography and some of her posts.

I'm a Christian Friend. I was raised as one, and identify as one now that I have returned to Meeting.
My wife is an Adventist. Both my wife and myself have an idea of Christianity that is closer to each others than the politicized version I see when I visit Ms. Alexander's blog. To be frank, I'm not sure I see Christ in Ms. Alexander's version.

As for why I care about men doing chores so much. Well... I've seen so many of these poor older gentlemen over the years. Recent widowers who have no idea what to do. In a department store looking for clothes, not even knowing what size they wear. In a grocery store, completely lost, because they have never had to buy food for themselves before. I can't imagine the feeling of helplessness at the simplest of tasks, that the Mrs. used to take care of for them. Gender equality doesn't just benefit women, it is great for men too.

I Know What Is Going On.

I can't believe how bad it is getting.

Every day there is a new outrage in the news. Something more awful than the day before. 

Committed in our names by the leadership of our country.

I have immigrants in my family. From Asia and Africa.While I myself may be blindingly Caucasian, that is definitely not true for all of my family. I myself have always been told that I have Seneca blood many generations back. I have friends whose families come from every corner of the Earth...

I was a child during the tail end of the Cold War. I was told that we were better than the USSR, because we were more moral. The Russians did things that we would never dream of.

Now, nearly 30 years after the end of the Cold War....

Things have gotten bad enough that my 85 year old grandmother, who I have never discussed politics with in my entire life... Brought up everything that has been happening, and how upsetting it is. Until this week, I didn't even know whether or not Grandma was registered to vote. My mother told me she didn't like to discuss politics decades ago, so I never brought it up.

Well, there is a reason why I have been keeping the Daily Outrages out of my blog. Not because I do not see what is happening. Not because I do not care about our Nation.

I actually am a very strong patriot. In the mold of Susan B. Anthony, Martin Luther King Jr., and Thomas K. Beecher. I do everything I can to make this a better Nation, for everyone who lives here. I even sacrifice several days a year to help keep our democracy running.

However, there is a real problem with fighting the Daily Outrage. Getting upset about every horrible thing that happens. If you do that with no breaks ever. You run serious risk of Empathy Fatigue.

Empathy Fatigue is something that happens to Social Workers, Civil Rights Lawyers, Teachers, and even Police Officers. After a while you see so much awful, your sense of Empathy begins to dull. The human mind can only handle so much before it starts to give up.

In order to avoid Empathy Fatigue I have been keeping my blog focused on how to deepen my Faith. Somewhat as a way to remind myself that I can be a good Quaker and a good person. That Faith is not the property of the Religious Right, that the Religious Left is heir to our traditions as well.

My sense of Justice is tied up with my Faith. After all, I am a Friend, and Quakers have a long history of being Moral Crusaders.

I am a Feminist and a Socialist (please don't confuse that term with Communist). I am against Mass Incarceration, LGBTQ+ discrimination, Racism, and Anti-Immigrant sentiment.

I stand for destroying Income Inequality. Ensuring that all Americans have their needs met. That everyone has Health Care, Food, Affordable Housing, the Education they desire, and the chance for a decent life. Working for a society that works for everyone. Not just some people.

In other words, I stand for things that I see in Quaker tradition, and in the Bible. God belongs to no political party.

Morality always advances.

There is one quirk of Quakerism that outsiders may not be familiar with.

Friends place personal revelation above scripture.

The Bible is important, but when it comes right down to it. We consider it to be just one way to commune with the Light.

Quaker reliance on personal revelation dates back to our founder George Fox. Fox preached that within  every person there is a measure of the Holy Spirit. In it's modern form we refer to this as, "That of God in Everyone," or "The Light Within."

Quaker Silent Worship has as it's express purpose reaching towards that light. It is an attempt to commune with the Spirit and receive God's wisdom.

This wisdom is then meant to inform our actions and guide us in a careful and caring life.

We follow personal revelation because of a simple fact. Over the last Two-Thousand years morality has advanced. It continues to do so. In the past the Divine was only able to reveal what the people alive at the time were ready to hear.

I tend to see the history of the Judeo-Christian tradition as a maturation process. You have the early Hebrews. Who were violent, arrogant, and obsessed with purity and cleanliness. Like a young child (who very often can be described by my previous sentence) they needed a lot of rules. Just as you need rules telling a small child not to hit their sister, or pull a vase down on themselves. The Ancient Hebrews needed rules telling them not to eat un-refrigerated and non-preserved pork and shellfish in the desert.

Then you have the loosening of the rules with Yeshua of Nazareth. Just as with a teenager, you are able to rely on your children to make their own judgements. Yeshu made it clear that the intent behind the rules was more important than the letter of the rules. That God is love, and following God will always produce love in this world.

Now, for the most part society has advanced to adulthood. Morality overall has advanced to the point where the Divine does not need to intercede directly on a constant basis.

Just as adults only need their parents when they ask for help. We only need Divine Assistance when we ask for it. Although, like any good parent, sometimes he will help us with something more difficult without actually letting us know.

Of course there are those who ignore current Morality and the guidance of the Divine. Who, for whatever reason act in selfish and short sighted ways. Who instead of loving their neighbors, find reasons to hate and exclude. Who like the proverbial Tax Collector, only love those who love them.

Following the Light we receive guidance to care for everyone. For all people contain That of God within. Even when it is so hard to see.

Worship is not for The Divine.

I was just reading Marcus Borg's The Heart of Christianity. There is a point in chapter Eight where Borg points out that Worship of the Divine is not totally for the benefit of the Divine. It is for the benefit of the Worshipers.

I long ago realized that for the most part occasions such as funerals, weddings, and graduation parties are not for the benefit of the guests of honor (especially funerals). They are actually for the benefit of the attendees (again, especially funerals). To strengthen bonds of community and love.

I should have made the connection before, because after all, what does the Divine need with worship? I'd think anything great enough to create the Universe would be beyond needing unending praise and slavish devotion. I've often wondered if it was human hubris to assume that the Divine needed the attention. 

The real purpose of Worship is to bring the worshipers together. To create community, love, and fellowship as a group. To connect with our fellow worshipers, as well as the Divine

I know that when I am sitting in Silent Worship, I feel so much more in tune with the other Friends. All of us aware of what was inside, and out, as we call to the Light within.

I've always been inclined to stay for the Community and Fellowship events. Realizing that Worship is for us, makes me even more committed to doing so. Whether it be Snack/Coffee, Potluck, or an Ice Cream Social. So I can continue to deepen my connections with my Faith Community. This realization makes me even more devoted to spending time with others I meet in Worship.